i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
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