I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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