I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I could fuck to npr.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
