I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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