After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
operation have a gay friend backfired
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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