My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
she pinky promised me she was 18
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Randomize
