LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
