And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
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so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
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You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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