so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
