Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Randomize