We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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