K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
