So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
