: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
