i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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