I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
