quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
