Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize