you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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