hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
