Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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