Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
We named our party play list daddy issues
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize
