It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Alive.
So much puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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