He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
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