I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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