My hair reeks of homosexuality.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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