Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I need moral support for this bender
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
