I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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