God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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