East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
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At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
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I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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