I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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