yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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