he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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