Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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