Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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