Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
