Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
