the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Sorry my hands just texted you
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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