Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
