so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
