i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
