eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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