if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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