if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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