what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
