so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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