It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize