I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I have tasted many bathrooms
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize