oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
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