We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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