I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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